Catica Ballero

Stag night shenanigans

Usually I love getting up on stage and performing. I don’t know the meaning of the phrase “stage fright” and can’t understand it when my fellow performers start getting all nervous and shaky just before their show. If you hate showing off, then why on earth did you get into burlesque??

However, last weekend I was very nervous about going on stage. For one, I was trying out a new military-themed act, which was a little close to the bone in terms of humour, and for another the manager decided to “warn” me as I arrived that we had a stag night booked in. I immediately looked down at my bag and wished I’d invested in some military kit insurance for my outfit!

I’ve never understood why stag nights come to burlesque clubs. Well, actually that’s not true. I do know why they come, but I also know why they always leave disappointed! After all, we’re dancers, not lap-dancers, I never get completely naked during my act and I certainly never get down from the stage and offer to take the stag ’round the back'for a private show. I keep telling the club manager he should warn these guys what they’re booking in for, as they inevitably get bored and rowdy, spoiling it for the rest of the audience. I guess all he sees are the pound signs when someone calls up and say he wants to book a table for a stag do! The guys in the club last weekend were really putting away the pints, which certainly didn’t help when it came to the class of their heckling…

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